I'm having one of those worrisome "I don't feel pregnant anymore" days. The cramping and spotting have really freaked me out. And now my boobs don't hurt AT ALL this morning and I didn't gag brushing my teeth for the first time in a long time.
I keep watching people in my DD group on FF with the same symptoms (or lack of symptoms) go in for ultrasounds and come back having no heartbeat anymore. It's scaring me to death. I just can't let go of the past. I can't get to a point where I feel good that this is going to happen for us. I'm very scared that we will get bad news tomorrow. I feel like I've told too many people too early and jinxed it. I've got two shower dates set already...bad omen?
Sigh...I wish I could just be a person who could get pregnant and just have normal worries rather than having a history of miscarriage and a $15K procedure required to get me pregnant.
Please God let my babies be alive and thriving tomorrow.
4 years ago
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ReplyDeleteThinking of you.
I just have a feeling everything is going to be fine. Those babies are here to stay Momma. Hugs, thinking of you so much!
ReplyDelete{{hugs}} Jen.... I also have a feeling that everything is going to be fine, but I've walked that road before and it's SO hard not to panic, not to think the worst. I'll say some prayers for you and your babies... and just hope you find some peace to sleep tonight.
ReplyDeleteI can't say it gets better after any milestone either... here I sit at this point, and I *still* check the TP for blood. :( I hate that we're all so scarred from this.
Thinking of you and the little ones!
ReplyDeleteHUGS to you!!!
ReplyDeleteOh Jen - I feel for you .... continue to trust in God. He will be there for you. I completely understand your spotting because every single time I've ever had spotting I always always always assume the worst, but what you DO have going for you is that your babies are healthy and thriving. Not sure how often you get to see your OB but it seems that each time you see your doc you are getting good news/results.
ReplyDeleteI'll be praying for you and your babies. I understand your financial burden and frustrations. Just know that your Heavenly Father is with you - always.